Chapter 26: Message From the President

 

Thank you everyone for all the comments, apologies for the inconsistent updates, but life has been a little hectic right now. Let’s fight on!

 

 

As one, the entire QQ Broadcasting Platform seemed to have gone crazy.

Supporting staff from Song & Dance Section and Language Section have almost gone mad, one after another they kept producing random ululation of joy.

“Song & Dance have reached a record high of HX$95,000. Haha! How should I say it, while there are all sorts of talents in our platform, our section is unfairly blessed, ah.”

“F***, just when did such a talent appear in your section, ah. We’re so jealous.”

“Aiya, when will we be blessed with a talent like that, ah?”

“Brothers from Outdoor Sports, I have an idea, just get one of your broadcasters to jump into the nearest river, he’ll be famous in no time, ah!”

“Get lost!”

The people from Languages were also excited to bits, for the first time ever, Gift of Gab’s total reward exceeded Harmonious Music’s. though it was only about a thousand dollars or so, a win is still a win, ah.

“Our Gift of Gab’s is certainly on a roll today, it was like the light of heaven shone on him, the reward collected up till now is HX$96,000.”

“Tceh, you’re sure your report is correct? How could Gift of Gab overtake our Harmonious Music?”

“That’s right, Song & Dance is the pillar of our QQ Platform.”

“So sorry to inform you people, if your numbers are correct, our Gift of Gab have surpassed Harmonious Music by HX$1,000.”

“That’s so depressing, well then, great me shall now award Harmonious Music another HX$1,000. This way we will draw.”

“Haha, you guys certainly like to cheat. By all means, go ahead and put in the extra thousand, our Gift of Gab is the genuine thing.”

While Song & Dance and Languages were busily flexing their muscles at each other, the other sections could only watch enviously from the side.

“God maker, ah, god maker, could it be that there can never be a powerful deity in our section?”

“Our Healthy Exercise Section only has one promising guy, but Little Schwarzenegger is only a small fish. Today’s reward is only HX10,000.”

“Haizzz, our Outdoor Sports is also in the same boat, Touring 4 Corners only collected HX$12,000 worth of rewards. Looks like we might end up at the bottom pile.”

“No way, there’s still that immoveable Prince of Last Place, Fine Food Section. With them holding fort, what do you have to fear?”

“Haha, that’s true, as long as Fine Food Section is here, the rest of us can relax.”

“Yi~~ wait, that’s not right, there’s something wrong today.”

“What is it?”

“Hey, didn’t anyone notice? There isn’t a single staff from Fine Food Section here, isn’t that odd?”

“Hm, looks like you’re right, just where are the Fine Food Sections people?”

“Haha, just what are you guys saying? Must you add to their embarrassment? The entire platform already knows their usual performance, ah. As for them not being here, their performance must be especially abysmal to the point that they’re too embarrassed to come out.”

“Actually, I’ve always said that the QQ Platform should just get rid of the Fine Food Section. It’s a waste of resources, more importantly, it’s an embarrassment to all of us, ah. Seeing those few monsters pigging out everyday in front of the screen really destroys our image.”

“I think so too, it’s better for everyone if Fine Food Section is taken off.”

As the rest of the staff got heated up talking about this matter, occasionally making sarcastic remarks at the absent Fine Food Section, it was at this time that a dissenting voice suddenly piped up.

“Good day everyone, I am Fine Food Section’s Liu Ping. I am very happy to present some good news for everyone. Our Fine Food Section’s Iron Star, Level One Broadcaster Ye Fei has just finished his broadcasting. The total reward collected is HX$235,734. This is quite an amazing achievement, he not only broke our Fine Food Sections Newcomer’s Records, he had also broken the highest record ever held in QQ Platform’s. Let’s all cheer together, ba!”

“Pffft~~”

“What the heck, are we supposed to cheer a mere trifle?”

“Liu Ping, have you gone insane? Don’t you know this is a company gathering? How could you just tell all that shit with both eyes wide open?”

“Little Ping Ping, I know you guys at Fine Food Section has been exaggerating your successes a little, but surely there’s no need for it to reach this point?”

“Over HX$230,000 rewards? Are you kidding me? If this is true, great me will eat three sets of lunches in front of all the company staff.”

“Haha, Little Jie, stop kidding around. You’ve already told this joke once and I’ve yet to see you eat any yet.”

Nobody believed it.

It was quite unbelievable.

Because that guy was a newbie, for a new guy to be able to collect HX$230,000 was like something out of the Thousand Night Arabian story. Only someone who had maintained a good reputation in the broadcasting business for a long time could even dream about reaching this kind of reward. Even then, they would need to display a unique skill in order to convince the viewers to actually hand out such crazy amount of money.

Just what kind of unique skill could this Ye Fei have? Everyone had already seen the video of his first broadcast. All he did was cooked in front of the camera. Though everyone could admit that his dishes were not bad, but cooking skills could only get you so far. A plain fish like him could only dream of leaping over the dragon’s gate[1] to become an immortal with those mediocre skills.

Therefore, everyone could only treat Liu Ping’s news as a joke, no one actually took it seriously.

“Harmonious Music broadcast has ended, the total reward collected is HX$101,000. This is too scary, his total reward broke the HX$100,000 limit. This has to be Song & Dance Section’s newcomer record, ba?”

“Haha, Gift of Gab’s broadcasting has also ended. By the time he reached that last paragraph, the reward had reached HX$102,100. That’s more than Harmonious Music by 1,100, ah. This is definitely our Language Section’s newcomer record.”

“Gift of Gab actually won against Harmonious Music? Such a pain the balls, ah.”

At this point, Song & Dance’s statistician Ma Tao turned towards Liu Ping and said, “Little Ping Ping, to tell the truth, your little deity Iron Stomach should have done quite well, ba? The rewards collected should be not bad, he should be Fine Food Section’s number one hero, ah.”

The others started to heckle him as well. It would be quite meaningless if a little deity who could gobble up 7 to 8 pounds worth of food could not gain number one among those famous for their eating skills.

Liu Ping, who had to weather such stormy situation more times than he care to remember, was perfectly serene.

Before the sea of people mocking him and his team, he merely smiled and said, “You’re right, Iron Stomach’s performed quite well today, he managed to collect a total of HX$88,000 worth of rewards. Unfortunately, he was not our number one. I’ve already told you who our first place winner is. Great Deity Ye Fei broke all records with a total reward of HX$235,734. He is our current number one.”

Everyone, “… …”

“Little Ping Ping, are you done yet? Jokes could only be told once, telling it too many times would lose its meaning.”

“That’s right, more than 230,000? You think that Ye Fei is a real great deity?

“I think there’s something wrong with Ye Fei’s head.”

“I think so too.”

“I think so three.”

“I think so four.”

… …

Over 230,000 worth of rewards? Just what kind of joke are you playing? If you say that someone from Song & Dance or Languages managed to win such a reward, we might actually believe it.

However, you’re trying to tell us that a Fine Food Section noob with a mere two days worth of broadcasting experience have gained such result, have you gone crazy or do you take us all for fools?

Therefore, not a single person believed Liu Ping’s word.

Fine Food Section’s Liu Ping sat with his arms crossed, perfectly at ease as he looked at all the disbelieving faces in front of him. It was as though he was watching a bunch of performing clowns trying to figure out how to open an umbrella.

“Horrible, it’s just too horrible, to think that no one would actually believe that Ye Fei achieved this kind of reward.” Tang Xiaomin puffed up with indignation as she glared at all the disbelieving lot.

“Well, they aren’t actually in the wrong. Our track record had been too poor, if I hadn’t seen the result with my own eyes, even I would not have believed that such a  great deity would actually appear in Fine Food Section.”

“That’s right, our section had always been famous for being dead last. With this kind of reputation, it is quite difficult for anyone to believe us.”

“I know, let’s ask Manager Feng to spread the news instead.”

While they got busy trying to track down Feng Tian Lai, a mass group message suddenly pinged on everyone’s phone.

“Congratulations to newcomer Ye Fei of Fine Food Section. To have achieved HX$235,734 reward at Iron Star, Level 1 is truly outstanding. The company hereby commend you for your achievement and call on all personnel within the company to properly groom this rising star.”

All personnel, “… …”

Everyone just stood there, stunned.

One of the Song & Dance staff blurted out, “Funny, another funny guy, just how many times are you guys going to spread this fake news?”

The moment he finished speaking, someone else said, “That’s enough, Zhang Le. Look closely, the person who sent out this message is none other than our platform’s Vice President Li.”

Zhang Le, “… Vice President Li…”

Zhang Le almost smacked his head against the table, reckless, this is just too reckless, ah. To think our company’s top management is also among this herd of people. That never seen before top guy had always been cold and aloof, ah. How could he just suddenly blast out such a message? Isn’t this a type of cheat?

QQ Platform’s Vice President Li continued, “This is excellent news, which is why I felt that everyone needs to know this immediately. I wish to also congratulate him for breaking the newcomer’s record. That’s all from me, everyone please continue with your hard work.”

Looking at Vice President Li’s disappearing back, tears dribbled down from Zhang Le’s eyes, he sat down suddenly, muttering to himself, “Fine Food Section? Ye Fei? You guys really piss me off, ah!”

 

 

 

[1] Fish leaping over a dragon’s gate – becoming an immortal – gain great achievement

 

 

 

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Translated and edited by Gumihou from kitchennovel dot com.

 

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