Chapter 1 – Are You Kidding Me?
Translated by Prosperousfood.com
Rehosted by Gumihou at kitchennovel.com
Ye Fei dragged his tired exhausted body and tiptoed as he carefully crept across the door of his landlord. He quickly reached the door of his apartment, and was about to insert the key into the doorknob, when he suddenly felt a chill. There was something evil behind him.
Ye Fei reflectively immediately dodged the outreached hands that were intended on grabbing him, and then turned around looked at the figure of the person who had attacked him.
Seeing who it was, he immediately smiled as he greeted the one person he dreaded to meet, “Sister Ma, it is already 11 pm at night. You have not slept yet?”
Sister Ma is the landlord of the tiny apartment he was renting. She placed her hands on her hips and angrily scolded him, “Ye Fei, better not act dumb! Your rental is late for over 10 days. When will you pay up? Let me know!”
Ye Fei immediately despaired, “Sister Ma, you know that recently I do not have any money. My salary is only issued on the 15th of each month. Can you give me a few more days? 15th. On the 15th of this month, I will pay you the rent.”
Ma Cuihua glared at Ye Fei until the hairs on Ye Fei’s body stands up. He was wondering what is going on. Does this lady want him to sleep with her to pay the rent? No way! I, Yue Fei, is a gentleman. Unless you waive the rental rates for half a year, I would not agree.
“15th. This is your own words! If you could not pay the rental by 15th of this month, you better pack your stuff and get out of my house!” Ma Cuihua coldly said.
Ye Fei immediately nodded his head, and smiled, “Thank you Sister Ma! Please do not worry, at the latest, I will pay you by 16th.”
“Yi?” Hearing that Ye Fei had procrastinated the deadline by one more day, Ma Cuihua’s large eyes were opened even wider. She looks as if she would chase him out the home at any moment.
Ye Fei had no choice but to immediately correct himself, “Sorry, it is 15th. The latest is 15<th.
Ma Cuihua was finally satisfied and turned around and walked back to her room.
Seeing that Ma Cuihua had left, Ye Fei finally wiped away all the beads of perspiration that had formed on his head. Then he opened the door and entered the apartment.
This room is about 30 square meters, a single apartment. There is a toilet in the room, and there is a portable stove near the toilet. This small stove function as a kitchen.
As soon as he reached home, Ye Fei sighed, and collapsed onto the bed. He buried his face in the blankets.
After 2 to 3 minutes, Ye Fei raised his head, then he turned around. He was staring at the white ceiling.
“What should I do? If I cannot pay the $1600 in rental fees, I will have to go hungry . Do I really have to borrow money again? I already owed tens of thousands in debt!”
Ye Fei was worried, and wondering what to do. Suddenly his stomach rumbled and growled.
Ye Fei got up from the bed and rub his stomach and bitterly smiled, “It never rains but pours . Right now I am as poor as a church mouse, and my stomach is growling in hunger. I better cook something to eat.”
Ye Fei made his way to the doorway. He was intending to turn on the lights. But as soon as he touched the switched, an electrical current flow through his body.
Ye Fei despaired, “Damned, I am dead meat! I am electrocuted!”
Just when he thought he was about to die, suddenly he heard a message in his brain, “God level Fine Food Broadcasting System had been successfully activated.”
“Hometown: Huaxia Guoxichuan Province, Lingyue County, Yinzhou City.”
“Political outlook: Was a young pioneer fifteen years ago.”
“Hobby: Peeping on women, love to eat.”
“Features: amazing appetite and not a picky eater.”
“Standards of beauty: As long as it is the opposite sex, I will feel that she is very beautiful.”
“Favorite colours: yellow, green.”
“Profession: Apprentice chef of Heavenly River Palace restaurant in Yinzhou City (studied how to cook for six months, but only knows how to wash vegetables.)”
“Stop! Stop! Stop!”
All the information constantly bombarded his brain non-stop, and revealed all his secrets. He could not stand it anymore and stop the system. If it continues on, all his secrets will be laid bare.
“Host, you have a question for me?”
“Of course, I have a lot of questions. Who are you? Why does your voice seem to ring out in my brain?”
The robotic voice rang out again, “God level Fine Food Broadcasting System. You can call me Broadcast System for short.”
Ye Fei was ready to hurl an insult at the source of the voice for bombarding his brain with useless information. Suddenly he paused and stood there dumbfounded. It took him a long time to regain his wits. He looked around him and asked, “What… what did you say? Are you a [System]? You are tied to me?”
[System]: “One more feature of [host] – take a long time to react to change.”
“The system comes from a world that you do not know about. The objective of this God Level Fine Food Broadcasting is to help the host to become the best food host in the world.” Before Ye Fei could ask a question, the Broadcast System introduced itself directly.
“God Level Fine Food Broadcasting? Let me be a broadcast host? Is this talking about the idiots that stand in front of the camera all day?” Ye Fei asked inconceivably.
Broadcast System replied, “Broadcast hosts are not idiots. They depend on their skills to win over the audience, and earn money as a result.”
Ye Fei thought for a moment that the system was really correct. Now that the society is well developed, there are a lot of new trendy careers that seem to appear out of thin air. The online broadcast host is one of these new professions, and there are indeed many excellent talents. Some of them are able to sing, beatbox, dance, etc, and some are even better than those of the second and third rate stars.
But now that he is going be a broadcast host, how is he going to film himself? He does not have any skills in singing, playing musical instruments, dance, beatboxing etc? He may know a bit of everything, but he is not good any of them. If he becomes a broadcast host, he will be laughed at by others.
“This… I don’t have any talents to be a broadcast host.” Ye Fei scratched his head and said embarrassedly.
Broadcast System said: “As a gourmet broadcast host system, my main task is to assist the host in the broadcast host’s path, the system will provide the host with necessary and timely help.
“Oh ~~~ this is great! This is really awesome! If you can do what you just said, I am willing to give it a shot. What should I do? How do I begin?” Ye Fei was excited and is ready to give it a good.
Since the [Broadcast System] will help him, then he had nothing to be afraid of. All he had to do is to try!
The [Broadcast System] did not care if Ye Feng is excited or not. It replied: “To be a broadcast host, the host needs a top-level equipment. The [System] can automatically configure the hidden HD colour camcorder for the host. We also provide a top quality microphone, a network device that provides 24 hours unlimited access to the internet, and a powerful computer.”
“You also need a platform. The system recommended that you use the ‘QQ live network’ platform. Finally, since you are food broadcasting host, you must have superior cooking skills.”
Ye Fei was still happy when he heard the first two points, but when he heard the last condition, his face immediately fell.
Must have superior cooking skills?
Are you kidding me? Just now you mentioned that I have just learned how to cook for six months. Now, besides washing vegetables or washing vegetables, I could not cook for the life of me.
“There is no problem in the first two points. The key is this third point…I don’t seem to be able to meet the requirements.” Ye Fei said awkwardly.
The Broadcast System said: “Do not worry about the cooking skills of the host. The system will help you. The system will provide the host with the top ingredients and teach the host top cooking skills. What the host needs to do is to do it.”
Ye Fei rubbed his chin, his eyes twitched, and he was glad to have a system helping him. But he did not let his happiness overwhelm his caution. He knew that there is no such thing as a free lunch. This system gave him everything, and all he needs to do is to go ahead and do it. But he did not believe that there are no strings attached.
“Tell the truth, what is your ulterior motive?”
Broadcast System: “Help the host become the God Level Fine Food Broadcaster.”
“Really?” Ye Fei didn’t believe it. Even if it was a system, it should not help him unconditionally.
“Really, what the host needs to do now is to become a good broadcast host. If the host completes the tasks that the system assigned, the system will reward the host. If the host is progressing very well, the system may also provide welfare packages from time to time.”
“Har? What tasks?” Ye Fei knew that the system could not help him unconditionally. In the end, the system wants him to complete what task? Increase his level and fight against demons and ghosts?
“Yes, at present, system privileges are only open at level one. All other privileges are locked. If the host wants to open higher levels of privileges, you need to use the money the audience pays.”
“Only level 1 is open? How much does it cost if I want to open level 2 privileges?” Ye Fei asked in curiosity.
[Broadcast System] slowly replied, “Not much, just $1 million.”
When Ye Fei heard this, he almost banged his head against the wall. Not much? And ‘only’ $1 million. Damn you, if I have $1 million, why on earth do I want to be a broadcaster?
“System, are you kidding me?”
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Notes: 喝西北风 – literally translated as ‘drink air’. Means to ‘go hungry’.
 屋漏偏逢连夜雨 – literally translated as ‘The house is filled with endless rain’, means ‘It never rains but pours’.