Part 7: Osaka’s Auntie Meets Kyoto Lady
Chapter 31: Let’s Go See the Dragon Boss
Translated by Zzonkedd
Edited by Gumihou
“‘Uwahhh, please don’t provoke them too far…” cried Natalia as she frantically ducked behind Haruna.
“If that is what you decide-”
“- Then we have no choice.”
Both dragons opened their mouths and powerful flames streamed out their gaping maw.
Most dragons have the natural ability to emit flames or ice. While their large physique alone could cause great damage due to their potential destructive power, the most feared aspect of dragons was in their Breath Attacks. A single gigantic dragon could burn down an entire town with their Breath of Fire alone.
Because of this, the residents of the village mountain gave food tributes to the dragons to preserve the peace. Anyone who managed to come to an agreement with a dragon would find them to be trustworthy allies. The villagers here had long since lived under the protection of the dragons through food tributes. Moreover, there was no real benefit for the dragons to harm humans.
Flames came from both sides of the road, and Natalia nearly fainted upon the sight of two Breath of Flames coming at them. If those flames were to even graze her, it would be instant death.
“Aa, here it comes. I should protect my ally first.” Haruna quickly stepped forward in front of Natalia and faced the attack head-on, protecting Natalia at the same time.
Haruna took a Direct Hit from the merciless attack from both Dragons.
As for the Dragons, even though they knew that it was the foolish behaviour of a human female who dared to challenge them directly, it brought them no joy to burn her to death.
However–
“Ahhh~, so this is what a Dragon’s Breath feels, ya na.”
“It’s weaker than a stove’s flame, ya.”
A voice said, as though the still-burning flames were nothing to her.
“Looks like I’m really a Chunichi Dragon Slayer [1], na~”
From within the roaring flames, a perfectly composed Haruna began to laugh.
Yes, not too long ago, Haruna, who had achieved Level 85, acquired the ‘Dragon Breath Nullification skill [2]. Even without this special skill, Haruna’s ridiculous status alone was enough to protect her. The one who had really benefited from this skill was actually Natalia who was currently taking shelter behind Haruna. The Nullification skill created a small dome around them that protected her as well.
“Well then, it’s my turn now!”
Haruna pulled out her sword and adjusted her grip–
“Tei! After Giant Exterminations come Dragon Slaying, ya!”
Haruna intentionally struck the impenetrable parts of the Dragon’s body. Not aiming to kill was Haruna’s way of showing mercy.
Still, with her cheat-level attack power, her attacks were incredibly painful.
The dragons let out roars of pain that sounded a lot like earthquakes as one of them was sent flying into the air. A human powerful enough to send a dragon flying was beyond anyone’s belief, but then again common sense doesn’t apply when it comes to Haruna.
The other dragon, sensing that something was not right, beat its wings and escaped into the air.
“Hey you, the one who picks fights shouldn’t run away! Stop with your petty tricks! Come back here and let me beat you up, ya!”
Haruna wasn’t as generous as to let him get away just like that. She raised her right hand and shouted, “Wind Magic, Rokko Oroshi!”
Powerful winds swirled and stormed down from the sky. The winds were so powerful that the dragon found himself caught up in the whirlwind and was unable to fly against the storm.
“H-Hey you! You’re not just a regular Swordsman, are you a Magic Swordsman [3]?”
Magic Swordsman was much rarer than regular Swordsman. On top of that, she had none of the refined attitudes of a Magic-user. Her fighting style was rather crude, which caught the dragon by surprise.
“My class doesn’t matter! If I cast a Rokko Oroshi then a Rokko Oroshi it is, ya!!”
The Dragon who had taken the wind attack fully in the face looked as though he was about to drop from the skies. Under the extreme wind pressures, he could barely control his wings.
Staggering under Haruna’s attack, the dragon had to eventually land. That was when Haruna struck.
“Here’s a table-turning pinch-hitting homerun, ya!!”
Without a single drop of mercy, she sent the Dragon back to the skies with a single hit of her sword/baseball bat.
“She’s a monster!”
“A demon has come!”
The two dragon gatekeepers howled as they propelled their wings and retreated to the top of the mountain in panic.
“Hey! Who are you calling a monster, ya! Or a demon?! I’m a cute girl! So cute that I could probably make it big in an idol band! Or even the Takarazuka [4]!”
“Actually, since you managed to beat up a Dragon, calling you a monster is really…” said Natalia, following her objective observation from her position behind meatshield Haruna. “I’m also fairly certain that you could even defeat the Maou (Demon King) himself. If you do that, you will be the undisputed hero of this age.”
“But Ma-kun didn’t do anything bad, did he? Since he did nothing wrong, can’t we just leave him alone?”
“Who is this Ma-kun…”
“You’re the one who started talking about Maou, right? I prefer to call him Ma-kun.”
By the way, Haruna was talking about some other Ma-kun, specifically Tanaka Masahiro [5], the star pitcher of the Major League from the city of Itami in the Hyogo prefecture. The city is just about a 10 minutes train ride away from Osaka.
Right upon leaving the train station of Itami, you could see the ruins of Murashige Araki’s Arioka Castle, where Kanbei Kuroda was once trapped.
Haruna and Natalia were currently heading towards the Dragon Stronghold up in the mountains. The climb took them a lot longer than expected.
“Oh look at this, if we made it into tempura, I bet it would be delicious, ya.”
“This mushroom also looks edible.”
“Woah, there are a lot of chestnuts around here, yan!”
Haruna kept up a steady commentary as she collected pretty much every edible thing they found on the way up the mountaintop.
Since the local villagers had not been able to enter the mountain, there was a lot of unharvested foodstuffs left behind.
“Are you sure it’s fine to take all this?”
“We’re Adventurers so it’s only natural for us to collect whatever local food and ingredients we can within the area. Also, there’s a possibility we might find some good things that the locals did not know about. If we can introduce them to some undiscovered edible plant or herb, it would be helpful to them also, right?”
Logical explanation aside, it would seem like Haruna just really enjoyed collecting free stuff.
“Could you climb up and grab me that chestnut? Should be easy for Natalia, since you’re a cat, nyaa.”
“No, please don’t treat beastmen as beasts! I mean, do you really think I can climb that tree?”
“I wonder if it will fall if we shake the tree a little.”
“Wait, why would you go through all the trouble just for a chestnut? Chestnuts are things we can just buy, you know?”
“Free stuff is meant to be taken, if you don’t take it you might be punished by the gods, wa!”
There was no convincing her, so Natalia just gave up on arguing. Haruna ended up picking up so much random stuff that halfway through, Natalia had to help her carry some as well.
“So you give away candy freely but hoard these, isn’t that a bit weird?” Naturally, Natalia’s curiosity led her to question Haruna’s actions. To her, candies were valuable things since sugar and other sweeteners were very expensive, things that only aristocrats and nobles could afford, but chestnuts could be foraged by anyone who would care to enter a forest. You could even get a bag of chestnuts from the market for a few coins.
“That is that, this is this, ya. Look, didn’t your mother teach you about this when you were young? ‘We are we, others are others [6]’?”
“I don’t know anything about that…”
It’s not like they were being entirely carefree either. While they were busy foraging for chestnuts and other forest treasures, dragons would occasionally fly down and try to get rid of the intruders through dive bombs or Breath of Flames/Ice attacks. They were, after all, deep inside Dragon territory.
However, whenever Dragons happened to descend, Natalia would just duck behind her boss while Haruna repelled the attack. It probably looked like an awkward comedy act to an outsider, but Natalia maintained that it was a very stressful experience.
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By the time they reached the Dragon Stronghold, it was already decided that Haruna would be in charge of fighting the battle against the Dragon Boss, while Natalia would be in charge of looking after the luggage.
“What the heck, why am I here anyway? And what am I doing with all these bags filled with chestnuts and grass and stuff in a place like this…”
Not only was her rucksack stuffed full of items until the point of almost bursting, but both Natalia’s hands were also full of foraged items.
“Natalia, you looked like an auntie who’d just come back from the supermarket, wa. In fact, I’d say you’ve just returned from a ‘Stuff All You Can [7]’ bargain day and managed to get a steal, naa.”
“I don’t really get what you’re talking about but you’re insulting me, aren’t you!? At any rate, this isn’t the best time to be talking about this, right…?”
Natalia had her eyes fixed beyond the plains just ahead.
There stood a Large Dragon. A Very Large Dragon whose size alone put all other dragons to shame. Judging by the length of the wingspans, it looked as if a single powerful flap could destroy a small village.
It looks like they had finally encountered the Dragon Boss.
“To think that humans could reach this place, huh. How unexpected…” said the Dragon, as his powerful voice reverberated around the plain like an echo.
“So, you’re that childish Dragon I see. You’ve caused a lot of trouble for everyone, ya. Just what are you getting upset over? Even an old coot who’d just lost money at horse racing or pachinko would have better manners than you!”
“Humph, it is the puny humans’ fault for failing to obey my commands. Those who disobeyed Great Me are just collecting their just retributions. Outsiders like you can just shut up!”
“Looks like we won’t be able to solve this through talking, ne…”
[Gumihou: Nyaa, Haruna-san, I’m with Natalia. Please don’t provoke the dragons…]
[1] Chunichi Dragon Slayer – The ‘Chunichi Dragons’ or ‘Chunichi Dragonzu’ are a baseball team from Japan with an official fan page and everything. Presumably, Haruna might be prejudiced against them because they are a Nagoya team and she’s a typical Osakan who worships the Tigers Baseball Team. It’s not a large leap of imagination to see players who could beat the Chunichi Dragons as ‘Chunichi Dragon Slayer’.
Find details of the Chunichi Dragons here
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chunichi_Dragons
[2] Dragon Breath Nullification Skill was acquired back at Chapter 16
[3] Magic Swordsman – I used the term from Returner’s Magic Has to be Special
[4] Takarazuka – An all-female performance troupe aimed at breaking boundaries. It’s actually quite amazing
https://savvytokyo.com/takarazuka-behind-scenes-japans-amazing-female-troupe/
https://blog.gaijinpot.com/10-facts-know-takarazuka-revue/
[5] Masahiro Tanaka – aka Ma-kun
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Masahiro_Tanaka
[6] We are we, others are others – Uchi ha uchi, yoso ha yoso
The theory behind this saying is ‘relative comparison’ vs ‘absolute comparison’ where say if you get a score of 80 on your test paper, but someone else has a score of 90. If you see yourself as 10 points lower than the friend, that’s ‘relative comparison’ If you see your paper as 80 points correct, that’s ‘absolute comparison’
Awareness of value changes greatly depending on the viewpoint.
This is similar to PF Drucker’s theory of water in the cup, half-full vs half-empty
[7] Stuff All You Can or Tsumehodai – is a special bargain where you’re given a container or bag for a fixed price and then you’re allowed to stuff as much as you can into said container or bag. Someone even put up a link on how to stuff your container to the absolute max and not lose out in the bargain, lol. Japan, am I right?
https://www.jalan.net/news/article/249238/
Here’s the website on how to pile your cookies higher than high!
