Previously in 003

“Oh? So, this is Mister Mukouda’s recipe?” I asked, immediately interested.

It was actually quite difficult to get information on that person. For someone who had been summoned as a hero, he was surprisingly reserved and low-key. If not for the Fenrir’s amazing visibility, it would have been difficult to keep track of him…

 

Peter

He was known by many names.

Of those names, Peter the Pestering Peeping Peeper had to be one of the more interesting ones. It was a persona he liked to use most, not only for its usefulness but also because it was just plain fun.

Sure, being Nosy Pete was interesting and all that, but it wasn’t quite as fun.

”Eek! A peeping Tom!”

Several women shrieked the moment they noticed my presence. This only happened because I deliberately allowed my camouflage to slip just enough for people to notice that someone was staring pretty damn hard in a direction they were not supposed to.

“No! It’s the Peeping Pete!”

”Him again!?”

“Get the torches!”

“Bring the sticks!”

I swear, some of these people must have quite the grudge. However, I must say that teasing people into reacting the way I wanted them to was kind of amazing. Half the fun came from these bunch of upper, super stiff creatures. Of course, I was not escorted to where the judge and other really important people like to gather around for their importance.

Luckily for me, I had seen the writing on the wall long ago and quickly ingratiated myself with the right people. After all, having the right connections means half the battle won. Or, was there some other more fitting phrase?

“Dame Carrie! He went that way!”

“Ah…” Was this good luck, or bad? Even so, I had no intention of giving in so quickly-

Swish– thunk!

“Erk!”

I nearly garrotted myself on my shirt. The sound of a vibrating arrow sounded like the buzzing of bees. I have been caught! Pinned down with an arrow, just like one of those characters that appears in the books.

“Well, well, well, look what we have here, eh?” Fortunately, Dame Carrie had chosen to shoot at my clothes instead of my arm or leg or, er, my head.

She had totally shot me in the leg once though, so I am sure that she would have no qualms about shooting me somewhere painful.

“I know you have a healing potion on you. Also, you would have deserved it,” said Dame Carrie’s amused voice as she handed her bow to a lackey.

I totally did! Haha! But it was fun though.

“Tch,” Dame Carrie sniffed as she yanked me by the collar off the floor, along with the arrow, with one arm! So sexy!

“Alright people, nothing to see here. I’m taking this pervert to the interrogation room.”

“Oooh, the interrogation room~” I tittered, because Peter totally would.

To which Dame Carrie shook Peter, me, until his teeth rattled. The women and their husbands shook their weapons at us and yelled:

“Yeah, get him!”

“Beat him up!”

“Exhile that bastard!”

“Chop him to bits!”

“Gimme the bits! I’m going to pickle it-”

“… hey, just what did you do?” Dame Carrie said exasperatedly.

“Nothing! I swear! I just, you know, hung around the bathhouse with a pair of binoculars around my neck. I was just birdwatching! I wasn’t even looking at the bathhouse but these people insisted that I was peeping on their women.”

Dame Carrie kneaded her forehead, “You do understand that I would have to toss you into jail for a bit, yeah?”

“Uwu, please don’t~”

“Guards! Throw this miscreant into the deepest prison!”

“Noo!!!!”

Peter was dragged away amidst cheers from the surrounding crowd.

 

Dame Carrie

The guards dumped Peter in the prison at the end of a short corridor. Calling it ‘the deepest prison’ was a great exaggeration.

“Hey! Where’s my rug? Did one of you take my rug away?”

It was also a sort of ‘home away from home’ for Peter the Peeper.

“You know, for an informer, you’re rather visible to the public eye,” said Dame Carrie lazily. Her spotted tail tapped the floor, indicating that she was more amused than exasperated by this human’s antics.

“Whaaaa—”

“If you want your rug, you’ve got to spill your guts,” Dame Carrie examined her claws casually. “And I don’t care whether you do it figuratively or literally.”

“Erk, fine, fine. Let’s see, you know Martha’s place right? Someone’s taken the largest room. Three someones. Some very important ones. Kind of.”

“Oh?” Dame Carrie considered the matter. “Do we have a name for these someones?”

Peter flashed his eyes around once before grasping his wrist with three fingers. It was the sign for ‘The Three Heroes’. He was one of the people tasked to keep an eye on them by the Kingdom.

Out loud, he said, “Dunno, but the girls beside the guy look real sweet. Especially the long-haired one. Although I must say it’s the wristbands that caught my eye. Quality things, that.”

Dame Carrie, his superior in this matter, hummed thoughtfully. “Wrist bands, eh?”

“Yup,”

“You sure that’s what you’re looking at?”

“Sure am~!”

“Very well, bring him his rug.”

“Can I have a hot bath too?”

“You can have a cup of soup, but that’s it.”

“Aww.”

“Cabbage soup.”

“Can I have bread too? You gotta give me bread.”

“Hah… fine…”

“Yay!”

 

Later, Dame Carrie penned a letter to the Royal Capital branch of the Adventurer’s Guild. The letter was simple and to the point.

Summoned heroes (1 man & 2 women) seen in Feenan. No suspicious movement. Appeared to be working as a regular hunting party. Will continue to observe.

Later, Peter the Peeper would disappear and reappear as a Cabbage Merchant who was just a little too free with his tongue. Even so, a lot of people still liked him thanks to his personable character and quality products.

Martha the Innkeeper was one of them.

“As promised, I have brought my best produce for you!”

“Oho, excellent. Now, tell me why you’re really here.”

“Err…”

“You’re here to take a look at those girls, aren’t you?”

“No, no, I would never!”

“Tch, go and sit there. The guests be wanting breakfast, so either help me or get out of my face.”

“I’ll help you! I’m pretty handy with a knife you know? I can finely slice those cabbages like you wouldn’t believe!”

“Yeah, yeah, you go do that.”

 

 

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