Vending Machine - 180 - Fishing & The Rocky Dog Mountain Floor

Chapter 180: Fishing & The Rocky Dog Mountain Floor

Link: https://ncode.syosetu.com/n7583de/

Author: Hirukuma

Translated by Zzonkedd

Edited by Gumihou

“Hey, hey~ you’re finally here. Welcome~”

The warrior with the trident had a boy with him. The boy’s clothes were [1] kind of similar to what nobles would wear, if they ever wore sleeveless shirts and shorts.

His brown hair was parted in the centre and his large round eyes looked bright and intelligent.

[1] Despite looking like a cute child, his demeanour was casually authoritative, meaning he must be the Director of the Hunter Association for Rocky Dog Mountain Floor. In this world, there were many humanoid species who may be much older than they look. Like Kikoyu, for example, who looked like a child but was really an adult.

It would be unwise to judge the people here based solely on appearance and getting into trouble.

“Um, Director?”

“Yup, that’s me. I’m the Director of the Hunter Association for the Rocky Dog Mountain Floor,” said the kid. Or kid-like person, I supposed.

There was something childlike in the way he puffed up his chest and the way he spoke. Could this be a way to lure people into a false sense of security?

“Hey, Big Sis, your boobs are super huge!!”

Just what is he saying with those sparkling eyes? This may be something that could be brushed off as a childish remark, but the issue now is… is that really a child or is he just callous?!

“Ah, um, thanks.”

Look, even the sociable Ramis didn’t know how to react to this.

“The sis next to you is completely flat!”

“That… what did you say?”

H-Hey! Hurry up and apologize, the veins on Hyurumi’s forehead are popping up ominously. She looks really angry, do you not value your life at all?

“Eh? I just said that she was flat. I really thought you were a boy for a moment, but you turned out to be a woman after all, just one with no sex appeal at all. That priest-like person’s smile looks really fake and dangerous and… wow, that dark armour and sword combo looks really cool. Are you imitating some legendary hero from a story?”

It… doesn’t look like the kid meant any harm, but he certainly has a knack for casually flicking at people’s sore points.

“Apologies! Our Director tends to blurt out his immediate thoughts. Do forgive his forwardness.”

The warrior person pushed the young Director’s head down as he made his apologies. While I understand that he is apologising, the way he said it made it clear he was thinking the same thing.

I could see my companions’ mouths tremble, but let’s pretend I didn’t see anything.

“Um, right, we’re from Clearflow Lake Floor,” said Ramis, taking the lead as the one who had been the least emotionally scarred.

“Yeah, we know it. So, what brings you here?”

“Well, it’s a bit of a story…”

Clearly, she was not good at giving clear, succinct answers. Let’s assist.

“Be-ar let-ter”

“Bear letter?”

The young Director tipped his head curiously.

“Ah, oh, that’s right, we have a letter from Director Bear. Maybe you could read it?”

“Sure, give it here.”

He skimmed through the letter swiftly, with the warrior peering over his shoulder – aren’t correspondences like this confidential?

The Director nodded a few times as he read through the letter before smiling at the end.

“Ah, so that’s why the monsters are so active. That makes sense. Right, I shall leave it to you guys to settle this anomaly. Let me know when it’s all sorted, yeah? See ya~”

With a wave of his hand, the boy director tried to leave but was stopped by a hand on his head.

“This is not a ‘see ya’ situation. I must apologise again and again for his rudeness.”

As I watched the warrior bow his head in apology again, I was reminded of the men-in-black bodyguards in charge of looking after Suori.

“Ow, ow, ow, that hurts! Your fingers are digging into my skull!”

The boy director had been thrashing about, trying to escape. Looks like the warrior retaliated by tightening his grip, even though his expression did not change.

“The letter also mentioned a request to search for someone. Could you describe them? I shall have the subordinates look for them.”

This warrior guy seems to occupy a rather high-ranking position. Since he’s more reliable than the boy director, maybe it would be better to speak with him.

Hevoy was elected to explain our situation with the Whimsical Fools and the person we were looking for while the rest of us were allowed to spend the time as we liked until the meeting time at the soldier’s barracks.

The boy director escaped as soon as the hand let go of his head. With nothing better to do, we decided to explore the place.

Shui was intrigued by the local cuisine and set out to look for a place to eat.

Mishael wanted a spare weapon and mustered the courage to ask a passing woman for directions to a weapons shop. The woman’s cheeks flushed as she gazed at him with moist eyes – a common reaction.

“I’m going to check out the magic tool shop and gather some information,” said Hyurumi before sauntering off.

That left me and Ramis.

“What shall we do, Hakkon?”

This place was like a tropical resort, if I had a flesh and blood body, I would definitely go swimming. Can you imagine a vending machine in the sea? Not to mention, the sea was probably infested with monsters.

The only thing we could do now is probably… fishing.

Whether we ended up catching a fish or a monster fish, we could still eat it for dinner.

Now, how should I say this? [2]

“Fi-sh”

“Se-a fi-sh”

Ramis furrowed her brow and thought hard.

“Re-el”

How about that? It should mean the same thing.

“Fish and… reel.. so you want to reel in some fish? Shall we go… fishing?” [2]

It was great speaking with Ramis, she always knew what I was getting at.

“Ye-es ye-es”

“Yay! I guessed right. Let’s see, fishing, eh? I’m good at catching river fish, but I’ve never actually done any fishing with a rod and stuff. Hyurumi seems to like that kind of thing though.”

Catching river fish without a rod? Did she use a net or something?

The idea of Hyurumi enjoying fishing was surprising. When I tried imagining her sitting on a large rock, legs crossed and fishing away. It seemed rather fitting.

“Hey, what’s all this talk about fishing?” Hyurumi suddenly came up to join us in our conversation.

“Weren’t you looking for a magic tool shop?”

“It looked like it’s going to take a while, so I thought I’d grab a drink first. So, what’s this about fishing?”

“Hakkon suggested we might try it.”

“Oh, that’s not half bad. Mind if I join in?”

“Yup, that would be great. We could go catch some fish together, just like the old times.”

“Just don’t start hurling rocks or hitting the water, okay?”

Ah, so that’s how Ramis caught fish in the past.

Watching the two of them chat and reminisce so fondly about their past, it was clear to anyone that they had been close friends since their childhood.

I even was a little jealous of their years-long relationship.

“What about fishing rods? Do you think we could buy them at the tool shop?”

“It’s a coastal village, so they might have them. If not, we could always borrow from someone.”

Looking for fishing equipment? If that’s the case, I have just the thing, dear friends.

While keeping my basic vending machine form, I modified the side and front designs on my body, the words [釣りえさ] or ‘Fishing Bait’ emblazoned in large red lettering.

I replaced all the merchandise with not just bait but also floats, fishing lines, and hooks.

People who don’t fish may not know this but vending machines selling fish bait are quite common. Non-fishermen might find it strange, but vending machines that sell fishing bait are quite common.

I remember them fondly from my childhood when my fishing-enthusiast father would take me along with him. Those old vending machines only sold processed shrimp bait but live earthworms and green worms [3]. Looking back, it was odd to realise that my first contact with these live creatures was through vending machines.

“Oh, what’s this? Are these letters from Hakkon’s world?”

“Welcome”

Since pictures of earthworms and greenworms were quite grotesque, I imitated the real-world practice of labelling the live bait product with words only. Just some plain black text against a white background. I also have fishing lines and floats, these were clearly displayed by their pictures.

In fact, I also have lures for pond and river fishing, but that’s for another time.

“Judging from the pictures on the packet, that must be a float and this one must be fishing lines with a hook. I’m guessing that the ones that don’t show any pictures are probably bait?” Hyurumi said.

“Why would bait not have pictures?” [4] Ramis asked curiously.

“Hmm, I guess it’s possible that it’s meant to be random,” said Hyurumi. “Or, maybe some people just don’t like the look of baits in general.” [4]

“If there’s no picture, how do we know what bait we picked?” [4]

“I guess… the letters on the packaging indicate the content, but unfortunately, we’re not able to read them.” [4]

How perceptive. Now choose your bait.

“I guess Hakkon don’t sell fishing rods,”

“Ye-es”

“That’s fine, it’s easy enough to make one from a branch. Let’s buy some tackle and pick out a bait.”

“Can I be the one to pick it out?” Ramis said excitedly.

“Sure, go ahead. Since we don’t know what’s inside, just pick whatever.” [4]

Hoho, now that they had picked out everything else, it was time for my most anticipated moment. The unboxing moment for live bait. To be fair, most women and children would get quite a shock when they first encounter live bait. Some would even scream and cry.

Earthworms are, well, earthworms. Almost everyone would have encountered them in one form or other, but these green worms are something else. They have been described as ‘quite gruesome’.

I had already secretly gotten my recording equipment ready! Now show me a cute reaction, girls!

“Let’s take this one and this one. Since the characters are different, there should be different stuff inside, right?” said Ramis cheerfully. [4]

I had already taken a look through the transparent package and… the long green worms wriggling around with their many legs were… ah, ew, to think that my body could produce this kind of product…

No, let’s not think about it. In fact, let’s not sell these anymore.

For now, let’s enjoy their reaction!

Reaction time! [4]

Ramis and Hyurumi held the packets close to their faces, studying the wriggling mess inside the transparent plastic package.

“Hmm, they look a bit different from the ones next to rivers,” Hyurumi observed.

“They looked kind of monster-like, but since they’re so small, they are kind of cute, right?” said Ramis.

Ah, er, that’s right. Since these ladies live in a world filled with monstrous plants and animals… tiny things like these aren’t that impactful…

In short, there were no screams and no cries of ‘Gross!’ for my entertainment.

[Gumihou: Adjusted the reaction a little bit]

[1] Add details

[2] Changed the way Hakkon thought and expressed this desire, since English language doesn’t have the same syllable limitation as Japanese

[3] Green worms – are actually Green Eunicidae?

https://tsuri-labo.jp/item/bait/7774

The google image of 青いそめ traumatised me a little, but, erm… yeah

[4] The girl’s reaction to the actual bait does not correspond with the reaction to the labels on the vending machine. Adjusted them a bit. You can’t have someone logically go ‘meh’ at the end. The joke just falls flat.

WARNING: May be a jump scare for those who are afraid of worms!!